In Momento
Mori, Sedaris writes about the different gifts he has gotten and given,
specifically in regards to his husband. I told the story in class on Wednesday
about how Steven kept "sugar cookie candle" in his notes app for 2
years before getting it for me for Christmas. I thought I'd write a list of
gifts he's gotten me that I probably wouldn't have liked if they came from
anyone else.
1. A yellow string bracelet. The
bracelet was from Francesca's, like the candle. He HATES that store but knows I
love it, so that's always his first stop when trying to find me a gift. This
bracelet in particular said it was supposed to invoke happiness when wearing
it. Neither one of us believes in that type of thing, but when I look at it, I
can't help but feel happy. I think of him in a crowded store, absolutely
overwhelmed and over-stimulated, but still looking for just the right thing to
get me. When I opened it he said "wear that and don't worry so
much."
2. A ring I didn't pick out. This
year, a week before Valentine's Day, I went to a Pandora store and tried on
some rings while my friend got Cinnabon. I sent Steven a picture with a
combination of 2 different rings on my finger and told him I really liked them.
On Valentine's Day, he said "let me go get your gift. I didn't wrap it...
sorry." He came downstairs with a giant bag from Carlo's Bakery from a
trip we took in December. Inside was a pack of gum. He looked at me with the
biggest smile and said "DO YOU LOVE IT?" Confused, but still madly in
love, I gave him a hug and said "OF COURSE! I'm gonna have the best breath
in town!" He pulled out a ring box and said "I'm just joking. I'm not
proposing, just so we're clear. Also, I didn't really like the rings you sent a
picture of. They just didn't look... fancy enough. So I got this one!"
Surprisingly, I loved the one he got me WAY more than the two I had picked
out.
3. A pair of socks. Right before
our first Christmas together, he took a trip to NYC with his friends. One day,
I got 5 texts saying "CALL ME!!!" I'm thinking there's an emergency
but all he asked was "what kind of dog is Maxine?" Maxine is my
rescue from the shelter and she genuinely looks like a mix of every breed. I
said "I don't know, a mutt?" He said, "okay thanks. Love
you" and hung up the phone. I forgot about the conversation as quick as it
happened. On Christmas day, he could hardly contain his excitement as I opened
a pair of socks that said "I love mutts" all over it. "Do you
love them?" "I sure do. These are gonna keep my feet so warm!"
He took me to NYC on a surprise trip for my birthday that year and couldn't
wait to show me the little stand in Bryant Park where he bought them. I don't
think I've ever worn those socks but I won't ever get rid of them.
I could've lived the rest of my
life without any of these material things. If they would've come from anybody
else, I would've surely lost them or forgot about them by now. I don't look at
them and see a bracelet, a ring, or a pair of socks. I see Steven standing in
unfamiliar, crowded places and still taking his time to find me gifts he thinks
I will love (which I do). I see his face light up when he asks "Do you
love it?" He's the best, I am lucky, this was cheesy. Thank you for
reading.
This post was so sweet and wholesome! Steven sounds like a great guy, and I'm so happy for you guys! I loved how you said that these objects wouldn't mean anything if they didn't come from him, and it brings up an interesting point. Objects and gifts take on new meanings due to the people they are from and also the people that receive them. For example, in "Memento Mori," the skeleton means something different to Hugh than it does to David (it creeps out David lol). The idea that objects take on various meanings that are not necessarily intended when they are created or gifted is so interesting! It's kinda like that idea that "one man's trash is another man's treasure," too!
ReplyDeleteAww this is so beautiful! Just like what Sophie said Steven sounds amazing and so happy for the both of you. Whenever I try to get gifts for someone I try to be funny but then useful at the same time if you get what I'm saying especially depending on the person. For you though, the fact that you said that if it would've came from someone else you would've just been like ehh but since it came form him you love it and it just warms my heart. Beautiful!
ReplyDeleteThis post gave me chills and put the BIGGEST smile on my face. I have to say, pretty often we give men in general a hard time, but like we discussed in class, there are certainly quite a few men who are good in this world. One who comes to mind pretty often for me is Tyler Izador (sorry if i spelled your last name wrong, Tyler). He is a very active member of the students for reproductive rights group and this week, while my organization was doing a menstrual product drive, came up to me and asked how long we were doing the drive so that he could drop off the products he had in his room. There are very few men who would do this, most men cringe at the discussion of periods. It just always reminds me that there are good men in this world who try their hardest to check their privilege and help other who arent so privileged.
ReplyDeleteThis was extremely wholesome 10/10. I loved the cheese. It sounds like you two have a really good dynamic in your relationship and I’m very happy for you. :’) Thank you for sharing this!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a wholesome post. This seriously made my heart smile because it's so encouraging to listen to stories about men who get it right. Way to go, Steven!
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