Let me begin by being blunt: I have never watched The Bachelor, but I also have zero (zip, nada, cero) desire to start. In fact, until I start researching the psychology behind the viewers of the show, I could hardly understand why anyone would watch the show. Here's the premise of the show (through my biased perspective):
Hello, America. Coming this January, another set of un-diversified, long-haired, 100-pound suckers get to catfight over the attractive male. We would tell you more about him, but he has absssss - that's all you need to know about this unreasonably hot male! Live vicariously through these attractive girls, some with epic sob stories(!!), as they all simultaneously date one body - it's the harem of your (sick) dreams. Don't forget to tune in each week as two or so women get kicked to the cuuuurb [I said that in a WWE announce voice - maybe that's how I've been doing this whole commercial], and watch their hearts break as you eat your popcorn at your silly viewing parties.
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| Wow, I could do a whole other blog post on the un-diversity of The Bachelor and how that both reflects AND reinforces beauty standards, leaving other people left undesirable. Give me more girls with black and brown skin tones, glasses, disabilities, size 6 or higher waists, ANYTHING BUT SKINNY BLONDES AND BRUNETTES. |
...Okay, yes, I am clearly bent to destroy The Bachelor. Honestly, the concept that 25 women compete over a single male resembles The Hunger Games in the most vile way imaginable. Not only that, but then their personal lives, sex acts, heartbreaks, and vicious gossiping are openly televised?? All in the name of receiving this final rose that 9 times out of 10 won't even lead to a successful relationship??? [Fine, after looking it up, there's about 8 couples that are still together because of this franchise, but that's still out of a combined 38 seasons from The Bachelor and The Bachelorette (Insider).]
So, why am I talking about The Bachelor besides to spread around my unpopular opinion? Well, I have several reasons. For starters, I don't see the show as feminist. Not only is the premise of the show awful, but contestants tend to be slut-shamed and objectified by other contestants and viewers. Yeah, gross. Furthermore, Amy Kaufman, who has covered The Bachelor for the Los Angeles Times since 2009, even titled her book on the show Bachelor Nation: Inside the World of America’s Favorite Guilty Pleasure (Time). By all definitions, this show is the most acute example of the phrase "guilty pleasure."
However, I think that most of my disdain against The Bachelor stems from my own lack of interest. In all honesty, I like to watch a lot of shows and movies because my friends watch them and I want to relate to them more. Most of the animes I've watched, for example, were recommended by guys that I wanted an excuse to talk to (yes, this has happened a lot more times than I'm willing to admit). I remember I watched (...and heavily disliked) Moana only because two of my friends gushed over it and I wanted to be interested in it, too. However, even though I know too many coworkers and peers (who are female by the way - this franchise is another thing I consider girly that I, once again, don't like) that gush over The Bachelor, I can't bear the thought of watching that overdramatic catfight fest, even if it means I won't relate to my friends in that aspect. Maybe if everyone had a revelation of how awful it is, I could trash-talk the show with them?
Anyways, to anyone who will still enjoys the show, kiddos to you. Everyone likes to escape their drama and talk about someone else's mess. Plus, I do enjoy seeing other people's dates and romantic lives (albeit only in movies where there are only love triangles between 3 people at most, not a love triangle between 25 or so shallow twigs). And, to any few individuals on my side, I hope we can talk smack on this show together. ;)
(Time https://time.com/5168186/bachelor-book-interview/
(Insider) https://www.insider.com/bachelor-bachelorette-still-together-2017-3#theyre-still-together-and-have-discussed-getting-engaged-18
Let me just say, when you interjected with the WWE voice comment and said "maybe that's how I've been doing this whole commercial", I not only laughed to myself but also questioned the entire reality of the voice in my head I have been reading this in. So good job, but #rude that you made me have a mini existential crisis. Also, I did the math, 8 out of 38 successful partnerships is still less than 5%. This is ~literally~ a more disgusting version of the Hunger Games (okay, that might be a little bit of a hyperbole, but I really loved that you used this as a comparison because it is way too similar). I am extremely surprised and happy that you were able to find a connection between this show and the guilty/not-so-guilty pleasures we have been talking about in class, and that you talked about in your previous blog post! It is important to talk about this show purely because of its anti-feministness (I know that isn't a word but I didn't want to double hyphen), but connecting it back to our course in that manner is really impressive. I would love to continue to talk smack about this show with you, but I have to say, because it's me and this is a Safe Space, that I wholeheartedly disagree with your opinion of Moana. Come on now, Holly, I thought we were Sudoku buddies!
ReplyDeleteThe Bachelor is one of the shows that my mom has watched for years, and consequently, she got me hooked on it as well. We have bonded over the years through our shared guilty pleasure. I agree with you that this is a terrible premise for a show and it does have many anti-feminist element. However, I would argue that the show goes more against healthy human nature than specifically feminism. This show takes it a step further because it is not just the women who are being constantly exploited and sexualized; it is also the men. And, the worst part is that they do this willingly. I also think that the only defense the show has is that their contestants do this willingly. One of the things that the show does prove is that everyone has insecurities, even the "pictures of perfection" who make it onto the show. It is sad seeing how much they will sacrifice of themselves to try to find love or please the bachelor/bachelorette. Though, I will go on living my life vicariously through the drama of theirs because that is indeed what they signed up for. It's just the hopeless romantic within me, I assume.
ReplyDeleteA really funny and interesting post! And I love what's happening so far here in the comments. Izzy's comment made me laugh even more--and I also started to re-read the post with the WWE voice in my head. Nick's comment poses some great questions, too, and kind of re-frames the issue.
ReplyDeleteI can also see people watching/analyzing the show BECAUSE it is problematic. (I mean, see my relationship with _Catfish_.) Sometimes looking right at something problematic is a way to understand the world that creates it more. (My motives for watching _Catfish_ aren't that noble...)
I'd love to talk smack about The Bachelor with you! But, I'm with Izzy, how can you not like Moana?? Back to The Bachelor: I completely agree with all of your points. My sisters are interested in The Bachelor because all of the contestants are such a hot mess, but I find it all sickening. It does seem like a form of cruel, dystopian torture, such as The Hunger Games, and I find it mystifying that people live and die for the show. I despise pretty much all forms of reality television because they are so manufactured and sadistic and bloodthirsty for drama, drama, and more drama. Reality shows put the worst of humanity on a pedestal and viewers worldwide adore it. Just seeing the commercials for The Bachelor makes me feel sick. I don't know. I guess it's a matter of preference, and everyone is allowed to have their guilty pleasures, but, personally, I want shows like The Bachelor to remain as far away from me as possible.
ReplyDeleteI HATE THE BACHELOR. (I've never even watched it, but I just know.) Also, the picture you put at the beginning is a thought I've had SEVERAL times, and the line "100-pound suckers" had me laughing so hard that actual tears were spilling out. Great post! And I totally agree with Vivienne--keep that show AWAY from me.
ReplyDeleteAs another non-watcher of the show, I'm curious to know the incentive behind continuing to watch. Like most reality television, I imagine it relies on over the top drama, just for the sake of getting you to make it through the commercial break. I think the only useful tool for watching these shows is to analyze it. Evaluating consumer culture reflects these institutionalized ideas on desirable relationships. Weird stuff, but interesting?
ReplyDeleteI watched one season of the Bachelorette to try to figure out why everybody liked it so much. It was interesting but also one of the weirdest ideas for a TV show ever (even weirder than Naked and Afraid). It felt awkward to see a bunch of guys fight over one girl and even more weird to see the fights and breakdowns. I can see why people like the show, but it is definitely not for me either.
ReplyDeleteI honestly haven't watched it, either (I've had no interest) but I did see commercials for it when I was younger.
ReplyDeleteYour post reminded me of Wanda Sykes presentation on Netflix I watched for class last night. It's titled "Not Normal" and in the bit she explains how women in society have been normalized in so many negative ways and The Bachelor being one of the factors that promote these actions. She explains how we have become strong in fighting for equal rights for women, yet wanting to run home and watch shows like the bachelor; because that right there is a show about exposing females as objects and being seen as HUGE dumbasses. They are seen as such because they are all fighting over one man who may or may not want them over someone else, WHILE banging all of them at once so he can better decide... WHAT. THE. FUCKK. EWW.
Your title honestly caught my eye the most, yes I'm relating this to Wanda's special again.
As she spoke about The Bachelor, she mentioned that the ceremony of roses is a bunch of garbage (couldn't agree more) and all I could think of reading your title was how she explained that if The Bachelor himself wants to pick a female, he should just do so by taping the women on the head . . . with his dick, instead of giving them roses.
You honestly really have to watch the special to experience the same enjoyment as I did, her body language just adds to how she's expressing herself to get the point across.
UGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH! I'm with most of the comments on this post. I HATE The Bachelor(ette)! I have had the joy of suffering through a few episodes with my sister, grams, and mom, and I will never be the same. Truly, I do not understand how, as women, they find that show anything but disgusting and degrading. I agree with you Holly; the diversity in the show is extremely disappointing. The whole premise of it is also gross and establishes a sort of distrust between the eventual couple due to the dude (or girl) kissing LITERALLY everyone and "dating" several people at once. I get it's trash TV, and it sure is, but just whyyyy?
ReplyDeleteAlong with a few others, I too have never seen a damn episode of The Bachelor(ette). I see absolutely nothing appealing about it, and it seems like more and more people each year are just over it. Wanda Sykes talked about it in her stand-up routine we had the option to watch this week, and her commentary on it is hilarious (but I wont spoil it for anyone). Yes, trash T.V. can be mindless, but so is House Hunters, why not just watch that? Dream of all the places you'll probably never live, ponder all of the appliances you wish you could have in your current tiny apartment kitchen, scream at the T.V. for what ever people(s) on their end up choosing because you can't see why they wouldn't want the house which ticks all their boxes and is under their price range!!! I digress... Maybe just reconsider feeding into the perpetuation of these sexist television shows...just watch House Hunters or Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives instead. Especially because Guy Fieri is a whole meme. Welcome to flavor town.
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