Why is it that people are so worried about how others think
of them and if others “Like” them? In the reading “Why Not Me?” by Mindy Kaling,
the introduction especially struck a chord with me with this idea of people
caring about what others think of them. Us as individuals, especially women,
are raised into thinking that we need to get people to like us based primarily
on our looks. Our society has so effectively brain-washed everyone that a good
portion of the population doesn’t even realize anything is wrong with telling girls
“you would look prettier in that skirt/dress instead of pants and a t-shirt.
This concept of being judged on looks and caring about what others think is not
even a thing in man’s world, since they are raised that this isn’t important.
The quote “…And these days, I find I’m caring less and less
about what people think of me…” (4) I feel is really relevant for college students
and for me in particular. Once you enter college, that feeling of wondering of
others like you and caring so much about what others think fades to non-existence
after only a few weeks. This feeling being so relevant in middle and high
school is so tough since this is already a tough time for kids since they’re developing
and figuring out who they are. The last thing hey need is worrying about what
others think of them.
With all of this being said, of course I was a victim to
this mindset for a year or two in middle school when it always seems to be so
important if the popular kids like you! However, I was lucky in the regard that
since I was nice to everyone, I was friends with almost everyone I would talk
too. Once I hit high school though, the mindset of, “I don’t give a fuck, I’m going to be me and I don’t give a shit if others don’t like it,” started to
become stronger. It helped that I had a group of friends that loved me for who I
was, and I didn’t have to hide any part of myself in fear of not being liked.
This made me start to realize that I really loved being me and not caring what
others thought and having friends that loved me for me, so my journey to “Not
give a shit” began.
I’m happy to say that at this point in my college career, I
honestly couldn’t care less what others think of me, which includes a small as
my hairstyle or my outfit to as complex as my personality and how I interact with
others. This culture of not discouraging kids from thinking that they should
care what everything thinks of them is toxic and causing untold mental problems
later down the road. I do my best in encouraging this mindset of just being you
and not caring what others think in everyone around me, and it has had its
varying levels of success since everyone is different in their “brainwashing.” I
love how I am now, and I wouldn’t change a single thing.
Kristina, I love reading about how your confidence developed and how you were able to create this care-free, authentic attitude for yourself. That's inspiring. A lot of people--grown women--are still not there. You should be really proud of yourself!
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