Laughing through life, the good and the bad

When I read through the section of Fey’s book titled "All Girls Must Be Everything," I was really thrown back in time to that awkward and uncomfortable time of middle school. I would be teased and bullied for physical features I couldn't control because of puberty, and my self-confidence was practically non-existent. Some of the features I would get bullied for that were on the list of “deficiencies” (pg. 20-21) were oily T-zone and my breasts were too big. This was made worse when my science teacher in 7^th grade, who in hindsight was very perverted, put me in the front row right next to him. I had developed before all the other girls in the class, and my clothes didn’t fit right, which resulted my breasts spilling out of my shirt 9 times out of 10.

I also had “brown” hair that was always frizzy, I had started getting acne, I got braces at one point, and I had really crappy friends who would point all of these things out to me on a daily basis. Surprisingly though, the thing I would get bullied for the most would be laughing all the time, smiling for no reason, and being nice to everyone I met. My one friend even said once, “Why are you so happy all the time anyway?” I feel bad for them now since I have a feeling these responses were a result of them not being happy and wanting everyone around them to feel the same way that they did. My only goal was to not let them make me feel bad for being happy and optimistic all the time, since that was such a huge part of my personality that I really liked about myself.

At one point near the beginning of high school, I also made a list of all the parts of my body I loved and was grateful for (pg. 24-25), and some included my bomb-ass curves, my long curly hair, my eyes that could change from blue to green depending on the day, my strong legs, and my small, soft hands (that one is weird, I know, but its nice not to have to use lotion daily!). I also realized that I didn’t actually hate any part of my body, only dislike a few traits that I could count on one hand. The one thing I loved most though was my ability to constantly find joy and laughter in life, which I was so happy was able to survive middle school and all its horrors (insert intense body shudder here).

In my life today, I never apologize for laughing long, loud, and hard at whatever I find funny, and my self-confidence is so strong that if someone tries to bring me down, my only thought is, “I’m so sorry you feel so bad about yourself that your trying to bring others down with you.” I genuinely believe I’m beautiful, and I don’t need anyone to tell me that, but it is nice to hear every now and then. I’m sassy, loud, stubborn, optimistic, and many other traits I’m extremely proud of, and while others try to tell me how to live, I honestly couldn’t give 2 shits about their opinions. I just wish the world could learn to laugh more and find joy in the small things like a rainbow or a sunny day instead of money and power. I feel though that the world is getting better, and I have hope for the future.