The other day, I was doing the readings for Ali Wong and noticed
that she would call out her daughters’ names in her book to remind them that she
is specifically speaking to them. This got me thinking about the huge impact of
names that society seems to skip over. Names are intimate and they mean
something. Instinctually, if we hear our name called, we turn our head before
it has even registered in our mind what has happened. My dad’s biggest piece of
advice when going to college was to learn everyone’s names and use them when I
saw them next. This shows them that you were impressed enough by the first time
you met to commit their name to heart, making them feel special. It also immediately
puts you on a more intimate level with someone, “first-name-basis.”
At some point in time, someone gave you your name because
it meant something to them. Often because they knew someone who they’d like to
see as a role model for you. Maybe simply because they thought it sounded
pretty or strong. Names means something, no one is going to name their child
after a terrible person, which would be completely demoralizing (but also
somewhat twistedly funny). Jenny Slate comments about her name in her comedy
special Stage Fright saying that she thinks that her name has attributed
to the bouncy personality she portrays. She explains, “Whereas if I were Susan,
this is how I would enter a room. I’d be like, ‘Okay, let’s get started! (kicks
door) JK, we’re already done. Get to bed!” Obviously, though, her bouncy, nicknamey
name has done a lot for her and her comedy career. The fact that she is bouncy
makes her lovable on stage and shows that she loves what she’s doing.
I am the oldest of four boys in my family and while my parents
were having kids, I would think to myself, “This is it. It’s got to be a girl
this time. The odds are stacked in my favor.” Since that never happened, I have
pretty much decided that I don’t want to stop having kids until I’ve had a
daughter. On Tuesday, I was listening to “Dear Prudence” by The Beatles, my
favorite band. I thought to myself that prudence is such a pretty word,
but I wasn’t completely sure of its meaning, so I looked it up. Prudent,
the root of the word, is defined as “acting with or showing care and thought
for the future.” That is just beautiful to me. I immediately stopped the song
and turned to my girlfriend and asked, “What do you think of the name Prudence Olivia
for a girl? And we would just call her Pru.” To my pleasure, she seemingly loved
it just as much as I do. BTW, I am not expecting a baby anytime soon, let’s
just say I’m prudent.
This post is somewhat a call to action. First, to find
the meaning in your own name if you don’t already know. You might find out
something you like about yourself that you didn’t know; someone liked it.
Second, Recognize the meaning and value to other people’s names. Listen to, and
memorize, the names of others when you’re introduced to create a more intimate
and dependable relationship. It makes people feel better about themselves
knowing you took the time. Lastly, please listen to The Beatles. If you haven’t
already heard, they’re kind of a big deal.
